God promised to be with Jacob as he went to this mother’s family. And God was with him. God blessed him with a family and great wealth. But he didn’t deserve any of it. Jacob himself recognizes this. He tells God, “I am not worthy of the least of all the deeds of steadfast love and all the faithfulness that you have shown to you servant” (Genesis 32:10).
He says he wasn’t worthy of the smallest act of God’s love, the smallest blessing from God’s hand. And indeed he wasn’t. For Jacob was a perpetual liar. He was a terrible husband and father. And he showed a remarkable lack of trust in the Lord. He didn’t deserve God’s blessings. He didn’t deserve God’s love. But God loved him not because he was lovable, but because God is love.
Jacob is much like us. We all fail in countless ways. We too are sinners. We too are unworthy of God’s love, God’s faithfulness, God’s blessings. And yet God loves us. God blesses us. Not because we are lovable, but because God is love.
Our greatest need is to recognize with Jacob that we are unworthy. We need to see that God’s blessings flow, not because of what we do, but because of who God is and what he has done. It is too easy for us once we begin the Christian life to think that it is all about our performance, about what we do. And so we gravitate between despair when we fail and pride when we do well.
And yet even our best deeds are as filthy rags (Isaiah 64:6). Nothing we do impresses God. Even at our best, we are unworthy. Whatever good we accomplish is due to God’s grace and the Spirit’s working in our lives. We have no reason for pride.
And when we fail, we need not despair. Though unworthy, God will still show his love to us. By his grace, God will freely forgive our every sin.
The truth is that we, like Jacob, are unworthy of God’s love all of the time. But God still pours out his love upon us like he did upon Jacob.
Father, help us to see our own unworthiness, and be amazed more and more at your unconditional love toward us through Christ Jesus. Amen.